A Safe Space for Moogles

So I was out walking today and saw that some of the neighbors have put up their Halloween decorations. Specifically, somebody has on their lawn a giant, animatronic Blackarachnia. I am seriously not kidding. O_O Legs! And hourglass! And the head turned to look at me, I swear. ...Actually, judging from the bloatedness, it kind of looked like a pregnant Blackarachnia, which is truly too terrifying to even contemplate.

I'll see if I can get a picture sometime this week.

I wonder if dressing up as Silverbolt for Halloween is an entirely silly idea.

This actually happened a few days ago, but I'm just getting around to posting it.

One of my jobs as a Kennel Girl is to clean up in the lobby when somebody makes a mess.* I was summoned to do just that; a mixed-breed dog of some sort had made a solid deposit at the Bank of Linoleum. No big deal - I grab my trusty Mop and some paper towels and get to work.

"I am so sorry," the dog's owner tells me, with heartbreaking earnestness.

Dear lord, I think, the poor man's about to cry. So I turn on my Cheerfulness full blast. "Don't worry about it!" I chirp. "This isn't the first time this has happened and it won't be the last! For this is an Animal Hospital!" There might have been some :D in there too. Working at the Renfest has prepared me for engaging with total strangers.**

I continue roughly in this vein while I'm cleaning, and as I finish, the guy finally cracks a smile. Proud and no little relieved, I return to my accustomed spot down in the kennel.

Ten minutes later, a vet tech somehow penetrates my ninja veil and finds me. "Hey, moogle, would you come help me with something?"

"Of course!"

I follow the vet tech up to the exam room and there on the table is the poor man's dog, having shuffled off his mortal coil and joined the choir invisible. I just about committed seppuku with a scalpel right there. The man wasn't sad because of the poo, he was sad because he was bringing his dog in to be put to sleep, and on top of everything else he had to listen to me being cheerful at him. Sweet merciful chocolate, I suck.

...I may have apologized to the dead dog where no one could hear me. And patted his poor head.

*......hides*



*Even if the vet techs usually take care of it, because apparently I am a ninja and it's impossible to hunt me down. ;P

**Much the same way boot camp prepares you for a brisk walk around the block.

Dad just found one of these in our back garden. IT IS FREAKIN' HUGE AND A FREAKY-LOOKING LEGGY THING. If I found one of these in the house, I'd have to move.

...It's kinda cool from a distance though.

So, this dog. Kind of hyper. Beagle mix, but I repeat myself. She goes home tomorrow, so today I was told to give her a bath.

Most of you probably already know where this is going.

I managed to wrestle her up into the tub (which comes up to chest height on me, and this is not a small dog) and keep hold of her while I sudsed her up good. She's doing just fine, so I take my hands off her for a moment to turn on the water for the final rinse and LEAP there she goes.

Fortunately the bathing room was closed off, so she wasn't going anywhere, but I still had to chase her around with the leash. The second time around she wasn't nearly so cooperative and I practically had to carry her back to the tub. By the end of it I was soaked in sudsy water practically from head to toe. But dammit, that dog got rinsed.

...Of course, an hour later when I took her out to pee she immediately started rolling around in the grass. I'm counting my blessings; there are worse things she could've rolled in.

...I'm going to bed early tonight. *thud*

But this is important.

WE HAVE BABY FISHIES!

I saw four about as big as my thumb, plus a teeny-tiny little orange one. So cuuuuuute! :D

...We now return you to your regularly scheduled flist.

So on Saturday Dad chased a Big-Ass Heron out of our backyard. Yesterday a few fish from the top pond turned up missing, and the rest are hiding under the lily pads. Uh oh.

As if that wasn't enough, we have a mouse attacking the granola bars in our pantry. Traps and poisons have so far proven ineffective. I darkly suspect that this is no ordinary mouse we're dealing with here.

...At least there's no bedbugs. -_-

You guys, I cannot tell you how delighted I was when I opened the Transformers comic and it was all "Optimus is all alone! Suddenly, MEGATRON! And then the oral sex!" I haven't read it all the way through yet, so my fantasy has not yet been spoiled. ;P But yes, Free Comic Book Day was totally worth the long drive through unfamiliar territory. (There aren't any comic book stores closer than a half-hour away. I pout. ...And wonder how much capital it takes to start one, somewhere in the reality-free sectors of my brain.) The second store was small and clean, pretty conventional as comic book stores go; the first one was more of a used book store that sold comics too. It was quite charming, in an overwhelmingly cramped and musty-smelling sort of way. Maybe on another day off I'll head back up there and raid their sci-fi/fantasy section. ^_^

Also, there are baby bird and puppy pictures here, if you have not yet had your dose of Cute this week. (I left this picture out of the puppy set, because my big head is kind of the dominating element, but certain people on my flist have expressed interest in pictures of me, so there it is.)

Good thing: there was the most adorable little yellow lab puppy at work yesterday and today. Sweetest and playfullest and lickiest thing on the planet, omg. *schmoops* I got pictures too, 'cause I'd brought my camera in to show off my baby birdies. ^_^ So you'll see her as a bonus on my next Baaaaby Robin Report.

Bad thing: the porn company sent me a polite rejection email. Ah well, at least they didn't leave me to twist in the wind.

( And a meme from deepbluesquee, because we squeep at each other. )

THESE GUYS RIGHT HERE, that's who!

I'm feeling a lot better about things today. ^_^

I found a job listing for a graphics monkey at a gay porn company.

You better BELIEVE I'm applying. *clutches resume and giggles!*

This makes up for that rotten little Boston terrier peeing on my leg this morning. -_- In his defense, I was trying to get my leash around him without getting too near his mouth 'cause his cage card said he was a biter*, and it ended up going around his hips. I guess there was just enough extra pressure there to, well, you know. But still, he could have aimed anywhere else!

*It wasn't like he was mean or anything. No growling or fear. He's just a regular, happy ol' dog who would really like to nomf my hand. ...And he's staying through next week. Halp. XD

This is in the bush at my front walk.



Happy Earth Day, everyone! :D

It was that he realized he'd taken on too many springkink prompts and was going to die. XDDD

I'll post the master list (along with prompts that I wish I could have taken, but someone else is going to have to do it for me, hint hint) once I get confirmations. For now, I have requested fourteen, which is more than I have ever done before, and this when I might be getting a second job soon. Which I have been talked into attempting, between my flists and my mom, even though the thought of working retail again, especially in addition to the dog place, makes me want to freaking cry. I have a feeling most of these are going to be short. Especially since I don't want to stop working on my current ongoing projects in the meantime.

...look, I've got to do something irresponsible, or what's the point of being young?

In other news, one of the ladies at work has adopted an orphaned baby squirrel. He's so young his eyes haven't opened yet, and she sits at her desk and feeds him from a dropper. I got to hold him briefly.

Just in case somebody hasn't: Amazon.com is stripping sales rankings from gay and lesbian novels, romance, YA and nonfiction - thus making them impossible to find in searches and best-seller lists. Supposedly it's a measure they take with all 'adult' material, but explicit het publications have escaped the purge while anything with a homosexual bent is Presumed Porn. Shame, Amazon. Shame shame shame.

And because the Internet's greatest tool of revenge is Googlebombing: Amazon Rank

And to think I thought you were such a wonderful place to get cheap video games. I guess it's back to rummaging through the used-games section at GameStop for me.

In other news, I was out today and saw my first Canada goose of spring. He was waddling along in the middle of an intersection like he owned the joint - and hell if the rest of us in our big scary cars didn't suck it up and drive around him. For all our civilization, guys, we are still nature's bitches. XD

(Incidentally, this was right after I realized it was Easter, thanks to a big sign in the window at Target saying 'o hay closed for Easter.' WTF, self, you used to go to church.)

And lastly, because big cats are awesome:

( Quizthing! )

I wrote a silly. TF, very short, somewhere in between seasons 2 and 3, mostly to cheer vani_nessa up but it'd be cruel to keep it hidden away from the rest of the Intarwebz. ;)

( Marissa Fairborn fought her way to the front lines... )

Also, we have a window-attack robin. In the mornings as I'm getting ready for work by checking my email, I hear him going 'thunk-thunkthunk-thunk-thunk' against the window. I'm not sure what he hopes to accomplish. He's not trying to get my attention, because when I step outside he flies over to the tree and puts on the innocent act. Does he want food? Central heating? Maybe he's got amorous intentions toward one of our knickknacks, I don't know.

Have I mentioned how much I love being able to pop down to Washington D.C. on my days off? ^____^ Seriously, it rocks. Even if I'm mostly interested in the museums. (There are a lot of museums.)

( Fun and educational! )

So, good day. But I am worn out now. *sighs and flops out* ^_^ ...Who knows, maybe I'll go back next weekend for the cherry blossom festival. :D

PUPPIES

A WHOLE LAUNDRY BASKET FULL OF GERMAN SHEPHERD MIX PUPPIES

ONLY TEN DAYS OLD THEIR EYES AND EARS WEREN'T EVEN OPEN YET THEY WERE JUST NUZZLY WARM LITTLE FUZZBALLS WITH TEENY PAWS AND TAILS

ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG DO WANT

...ahem. Have I mentioned I love my job? ^_^

Anyhoo, enough of this mushy stuff. I have another set of five questions! :D These are from the lovely and talented (lj)vani_nessa.

( Answer me these questions five... )

Golden retriever puppy! Sweet friendly beautiful golden retriever puppyyyyyy! *hearts* Not a puppy-puppy, she was in that all-knees-and-elbows adolescent stage, but that didn't make her any less cute. I fussed her lots and played with her when we were out on our walk. ^_^

Also, note_to_dog_owner: what would possess you to name your poor pooch Puff Puff? She's got enough issues just being a chihuahua. ...*ducks*

Also also, from the 'worth reading' files: What happened to Michael Vicks' dogs, courtesy of Sports Illustrated. It made me so happy, you guys. The strength of those dogs and their caretakers is amazing. I want to give them all hugs and treats.

*...is a dog dork*

Day 4: Today I made a new friend - an absolutely beautiful cat named Zen. She's smaller and more finely-built than most cats, with beautiful dark brown stripes on pale tan fur. I'd let Mom borrow my camera, otherwise I would've tried to sneak a picture of her... anyway, she's a total and utter sweetheart and I was upstairs loving on her every chance I got. ^_^;;; I'll be sad when she leaves tomorrow. Hopefully I'll have time to get one last cuddle in.

You know, having this job has really driven home how much more comfortable with animals I am than with people. I can rattle off the names, breeds, health issues, likes and dislikes of every animal I take care of, but I still barely remember the receptionists' names. They're all perfectly nice people and have been nothing but friendly to me, but I just... haven't connected with them, I guess. Of course, I never really figured out the secret to making human friends. Animals are less complicated. And less likely to shred your self-esteem for their own amusement, but that's neither here nor there.

In other news, I'm linking this for my own reference, because it makes me feel like writing again.

Day 3: OMG BABY TURTLE. Seriously, guys, the stubby little feets and cute little face are adorable, but that little headtilt? Slays me. So hard. *hearts*

...look, you want dignity, you're on the wrong blog. ;P

Speaking of no dignity, this is what I'm getting my grandmother for Christmas. At my mother's insistence, mind, because - is anyone else as creeped out as I am? o_o I feel like I should be wearing a cross and waving garlic. I'm amazed Mom doesn't see it, as big a Buffy fan as she is.

Today two of the techs carried a dead dog in a plastic bag past me on a stretcher.