So this dog comes in to check out a limp. She's older, has hip displasia (probably spelling that wrong), and is at least twenty pounds overweight, and Doc detects a bit of arthritis. "The best thing we can do for this dog," she tells the owner, "is get some weight off her. What do you feed her?"
"Oh, we feed her this low-calorie kibble..."
"Well, that's good."
"And she gets table scraps."
"Yeah, you'll need to cut that out. Table scraps aren't really-"
"And she gets a hot dog every day."
"And she gets beef jerky."
"And she gets cheese."
"And she gets McDonald's."
"Dear God, man."
And you wonder why she's overweight. XD Doc was dubious about the dog's chances of regaining a girlish figure given how the guy went on, but maybe it sunk in a bit when she started horrified-laughing at him, right around the time the cheese was brought up. We can hope!
(This blog is rapidly being taken over by crazy work stories. I was afraid this would happen.)
SPEAKING OF WEIGHT LOSS, I am going to have to revamp my eating habits, because I simply do not have time or energy to exercise anymore. Mornings before work, I'd have to get up at the asscrack of dawn to have enough time to exercise* and take a shower, and when I come home from work I am just too damn wiped. This is going to be difficult, especially since after unloading this week's groceries, I have a sneaking suspicion there will be Cookies in the near future. *thinks*
*Anyone who says to me 'oh, you can't spare just thirty minutes?' is a DIRTY DIRTY LIAR. It never takes just thirty minutes, because you have to find the one bra that holds your boobs more or less in one place so you don't give yourself a concussion, and then you either dig your music player out of whatever pocket you left it in or set up the DDR if for some reason you don't feel like going outside and displaying your huffing, jiggly self to all the neighbors, and then you have to stretch, and then you have to warm up, and THEN you exercise, and then you cool down, and stretch again, and slurp down a glass of water, and that's half the morning gone right there and you are in desperate need of a shower because you are sweaty and gross. The only way exercise takes thirty minutes is if you skip the exercise.