Because the next step up is interpretive dance, and nobody wants to see that.
*trots out onstage carrying a pack of posterboard and a Sharpie*
*writes carefully, making the Sharpie go squeak*
Sign: "This is to let you all know that I am ill."
*tosses posterboard aside, making it go whumph on the stage; starts writing on the next one, squeaksqueak*
Sign: "My throat is very very sore and I cannot speak above a croak."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "I will be spending most of the day on the couch."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "If you are waiting for a ficlet or comment from me, rest assured..."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "...I will deliver; just not right now."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "Thanks for your patience."
*collects fallen posterboard, bows to audience, trots offstage*
*writes carefully, making the Sharpie go squeak*
Sign: "This is to let you all know that I am ill."
*tosses posterboard aside, making it go whumph on the stage; starts writing on the next one, squeaksqueak*
Sign: "My throat is very very sore and I cannot speak above a croak."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "I will be spending most of the day on the couch."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "If you are waiting for a ficlet or comment from me, rest assured..."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "...I will deliver; just not right now."
*whumph, squeaksqueaksqueak*
Sign: "Thanks for your patience."
*collects fallen posterboard, bows to audience, trots offstage*