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June 25th, 2008

That Which Is

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Today in therapy my psychologist took me through some simple meditation.

I'd done stuff like it before, during Renfest rehearsals specifically, but it was mostly visualization techniques and anyway that's a place I don't want to go back to right now. This was very basic: focusing on the breath. It's... surprisingly difficult. It doesn't feel natural to me to focus on how I'm breathing, because I keep wanting to try to breathe deeper, slower, more in the belly, and trying to force your breath to do that kind of hurts after a while. My psychologist said that's normal, and that I'd get better with practice, which was encouraging.

While doing this, I also started noticing how tense my body was in places. My legs, then my arms where I had my elbows on the armrests - like I was straining to hold myself up even though the chair had a back. I managed to relax them with some effort - not, I admit, the point of the exercise, but it felt like the thing to do - and toward the end of the meditation, I actually felt something. Like om. That's the best I can explain it. I know it sounds weird, but I wasn't even looking for it, it just came to me.

...This is going to be an interesting journey.

In other news, my parents have officially bought a house. It's in northern Virginia, I don't remember exactly where, but it's close enough to Washington to make little difference. (I would've preferred Maryland, given my druthers, but it's their house.) I've seen pictures of it. It's very nice, quite huge (vacuuming is going to be a pain in the butt), and the backyard has an honest-to-goodness koi pond. With actual koi in it. :O

There's also two guests rooms which Mom is making noises about putting me in, and a finished basement with a projector screen. It all sounds lovely, but... I dunno how much I'm going to enjoy it. I'll be too focused on finally moving out of my parents.

Lastly, a memething from (lj)lighttomoyo:

I'm afraid of 19 out of 72 common fears. )

February 26th, 2008

Obama rally: aftermath.

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So. Um. Can I just go on record as being a total Obama fangirl now? *flails* He took his speech right from my heart, I swear to all. If he gets in, we just might be able to fix some of this shit.

In completely unrelated news, Dad was contacted today about a possible job in Colorado Springs. Right now it's only a possibility (for various inscrutable reasons that basically boil down to "the military enjoys shuffling papers"), but if he does get the job, I'll think seriously about following my parents there. Apparently the job market's pretty good in Colorado, and it's close enough to California and Oregon to make visiting there a possibility.* If Colorado's out, then I'll probably wind up in New England somewhere - no further south than Maryland, and within driving distance of DC. Which, incidentally, is the place Dad's most considering moving to. I'm oddly okay with this, considering I'm sick of living with my parents. Who knows, maybe I'll choose whichever option my parents don't.

You have no idea how much of a relief it is to even have it narrowed down this much.

Also, this is so cool.

*To someone who's used to all-day drives, at least. To non-military-brats it might seem a bit less reasonable to pop up to another state for a long weekend.

December 7th, 2007


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According to this site, if I want to get a UK work visa, I need to find an employer willing to import me. Which it looks like most wouldn't be willing unless you're a nurse or an IT person. Possibly my best bet is to hang out in America a while longer. That way I can get a bachelor's degree (ugh, more school!) and build up my savings account and apply for the Highly Skilled Migrant Programme. ...Or I could sucker some poor Brit into marrying me. Because I'm such a femme fatale and all. 6_6

Notice this doesn't really solve my most pressing problem, i.e. Where The Hell Am I Gonna Go After I Graduate.

OH OH ALSO. Nigella Lawson + being called fat = WHAT. (Yes, it's another skinniness-in-the-media rant. Deal with it. While you're at it go read the comments, there's some really good ones.)

First, that woman is gorgeous. Look at her, seriously. Second - she's a professional chef. Since when is it her job to be a beanpole? What kind of message would that send?

I've been getting really irate about this issue lately.

EDIT: I've squished three bugs in the past two weeks that look like this. No wonder I've been so itchy lately. ...Oh, shit.
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